Chocolate Teapot Ranked More Effective than Ruben Amorim’s Dubious Man Utd Tactics Board in Harsh New Poll

The fallout from Manchester United’s humiliating defeat to Grimsby is mounting for manager Ruben Amorim.

Accusations of cowardice have surfaced against Amorim for allegedly staying seated in the dugout during the penalty shootout, and his reliance on a tactics board was mocked as United lagged 2-0 behind.

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Fans mocked the manager’s dependence on a laminated clipboard for manipulating magnetic pieces and attempting to find a new formation for the squad.

Supporters have voted that a CHOCOLATE TEAPOT would be more effective than the tactics board employed by the Portuguese manager.

In a poll by Paddy Power, fans were asked whether the notoriously ineffective chocolate-based drink container was superior to Amorim’s strategy device—and they overwhelmingly opted for the chocolate teapot.

Additional notable results from Paddy Power’s recent viral Instagram poll revealed that a pint of milk left near a radiator lasts longer than a United manager.

Moreover, respondents indicated that standing on an upturned plug is less painful than watching the struggling Red Devils execute Amorim’s preferred 3-4-3 formation.

A spokesperson for Paddy Power remarked: “While Ruben Amorim was busy moving his magnets on the tactics board, his team was doing similarly lackluster work on the pitch.

“It seems Manchester United has been going in circles for years, with minimal progress to show for it.”

“We asked the public what they considered more useful, and the feedback reflects the sentiment—it’s high time for Jim Ratcliffe to consider investing in a chocolate teapot for the training ground café!”

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Amorim is under increasing pressure at Old Trafford following a dismal start to the season, leading fans to call for his ousting.

The 40-year-old appears to be running out of chances and needs a solid performance this Saturday as United faces newly promoted Burnley at home.

Ruben Amorim delivers an apologetic message to Man Utd fans after the embarrassment against Grimsby

He has managed only one win in his last seven matches across all competitions, translating to a win percentage slightly above 37% during his time at United.

Following the loss to Grimsby, Amorim acknowledged that his players might not be fighting for him.

He stated: “Ultimately, it’s irrelevant whether we recover or not; it’s the signals the team sent during the match, especially at the outset.”

“I think the better team prevailed today, the only one that truly turned up.”

“Even the best players can find themselves on the losing side, as one side can outplay another; and today’s match plainly illustrated that reality.”

He further commented: “It’s clear what was communicated, so let’s move past this day; the events of the game were evident to all.”

“Our start to the game lacked intensity; we failed to apply pressure—we were utterly disoriented, leading to the loud message we received.”